Dud Sea Scrawls The Writing, clearly, is not on the wall!

Black mamba is tiring off LOL. The other day in the SB, mamba expressed a desire to find something new. As luck would have it, (or bad luck depending on what side of it u happen to be) Mamba has found something new. As an aside, there is a valid reason for the existence of the phrase Aasteen ka saaanp. That’s aaasteen as in a sleeve and not ass teen as in 3 asses (the horror- we gots troubles enough with one – dunn wanna think of three)

Hokey, so the new thing is ban. Not ban as in ray ban but ban as in banned. It’s the hot new word. People have been talking about it and Mamba thinks, “ Me likey “. So ban it is.

With a word like ban, we needs people to ban. And we are in the right place for that. The asylum is full of loonies that are running amok and cud do with a little banning.

Here we go. And before I start. People, make yourselves comfortable. Grab a chair, lean against a wall. Whatever. No, you can’t grab popcorn. Why, cuz I am not manning the popcorn stall. I am banning.

Here’s how we are going to do this. The ID and it’s the ID I have given people and the reason they are getting banned for. No they are not in alphabetical order. Two reasons. We are too crazy for the order and we never learnt A B X in order………

Whiner (IW) gets banned for saying there are 10 better writers than Nazi (asuph) in the asylum. He knows counting. That’s just too sane. He also gets banned for leaving meal announcements like lunch break and chai break in the SB. These aren’t innocuous little messages, rather, dots and dashes for one secret admirer. Now we think that admiration is noble but very ignoble to do it in secret. Higher is the crime to encourage it with the said messages.

Nazi (Asuph) gets banned for time and time again disowning his dysfunctional family. Dude, u got family problems, u fix them. No, disowning is not a fix

Doll (Ananth) gets banned for calling every married female member aunty. Now, Mamba, being single, misses out on this aunty hood. Doll gets the ban for the unfairness of it.

Tictoc/farebi (Tocsin) gets banned for calling a member babyji. The sheer gall of it!

Dooba hua (seaswallowme) gets banned for being a tease. He posts only part Is and not IIs. Not done.

The queen (salonii) gets the chop for chopping or threatening to chop of heads. Her “off with the head” is a public hazard.

Kauphy, the new rangroot (that’s recruit for you phirangs) gets banned for calling every one else mad. Heck’s you’re in the asylum. Whadya expect. I’ve been told kauphy joined the asylum to meet aspiring writers. My tip. If you want to meet writers, start writing. Buckwass will only get u more buckwass

De (deSilva) gets banned for leaving drunken messages on the SB. Yesh you, De, U get banned.

Fizz (fizo) gets banned for ragging the newbies. And, then, not ragging some newbies. As a result of which they don’t blog. Be consistent.

Chay gets banned for chayisms and exhausting people with her exuberance and ebullience and all the other E stuff.

RamDram (Rama the drama) gets banned for cutting short his counting time in the shower. We wait for 3 minuntes and religiously(!) count till 180.

Void gets banned for posting one hoodoo, for whining about a move forever and then not reappearing after the much whined about move.

Imp (bottled Imp) gets banned for talking about food tours that yours truly can’t attend and then talking about random stuff he is snacking on.

Pradz gets banned for posting those kickass pics. No one dares to post any pics after that.

Doh gets banned for posting the bra blog and then leaving footprints all over the place. I meant the SB. Get your mind out of the gutter, people. ( Chup buck!)

Vivek Gets the ban for mixing languages and posting stuff rated A

Ashoe gets banned for leaving messages in his cache. Said messages pop out at unsuspecting loonies at unexpected times. My insurance refuses to pay for my cardiologist’s appointment and has labeled my file hypochondriac. Insurance people must spend a day in the asylum.

Scary (scarlett o hara) gets banned for banging into doors and excessive rolling on the floor. She is wearing out the carpets and the doors are worse for the wear.

Iblert (IBLU) gets banned for not spending much time with the fellow loonies in the asylum. We thought post marriage we’ll get another loony. Turns out we lost one.

Bleu gets banned for writing poems that are more rap than rhyme. It’s the good writings people not the ghetto.

Kaguma (Inmyeye) gets banned for being a wok. We know its an asylum and people are nuts, but ,seriously now. A wok?

Mel (Silent Melody) gets banned for getting us addicted to the lounge series. We are now suffering from withdrawl and thats a pain in the wrong place, we tell ya.

Maria gets banned for being one sane voice in the asylum.

Chet (cheti) gets banned for doing a cheti. That’s the original sin and he gets thrown out for it.

Casper (ano) gets the ban for giving cold hugs, Brrr. We’ll un-ban you in the summers when the hugs will save us some moolah on the AC bill

CeC gets the ban for scaring the bejeejus out of black mamba. Mamba almost turned white out of fear. Not done. And not being aware of the one tocsin award that the Mamba has.. tchah !

Funny and peppy ( funnicide and peppy ) get banned for the yaya sisterhood. Void gets banned again for founding the sister hood. How does a brother found a sisterhood? How confusing is that?

Crys( Crystal blur) is the obfusscator and one reason why ban is suddenly such a hot word.

Suchi (suspension of disbelief) gets banned for her ID. Sod it all!!

Bilbo gets banned for posting picks that might not be representative of the actual taste of food. Now if that isn’t really up cooked up, don’t know what is. Cooking up whatchamacallits and what nots without knowing what goes into the masala of masala-ed popcorn, say wot?

Buck (buckwassur) gets the ban for just being the chief. If the junta is all gone, who are u the chief of. Banned

I guess Mamba is done banning all the asylees. The tag line should now read, “ the writing is not on the wall. (Cus there is no wall at all). It clearly (s) crawled out.”