Dud Sea Scrawls The Writing, clearly, is not on the wall!

It’s a poignant moment in the movie. You are enthralled and wondering who will be revealed as the traitor. And suddenly, you hear a huge laughter behind your seat. You turn to find three South-Asian college kids talking so loud that you wish you had your baseball bat with you. You tell them to be quiet which they don’t listen but the incident remains with you.

For all Rajni Fans in the US, the wait is finally over. It will truly be a worldwide release! Sivaji in India, June 15th. Sivaji in US of A, June 15th! Whoohoo! As a die-hard Rajni fan, I rushed to all the websites offering tickets for “Thalaivar” movie. The ticket prices made me jump out of my seat with joy. I was hoping the organizers would be stupid enough to raise the regular ticket price of $8 by only 3 or 4 dollars. No! They have restored my faith by doubling it to $16! Whoohoo!

“Good is not good when better is expected”, said Thomas Fuller.

It is the curse of Heroes to rise up when the time demands. They became Heroes in the first place because they did so in uncompromising fashion when you were just a kid. They did it not once, but consistently over a period of time with unflinching integrity and panache. They made you feel proud. You related directly to their heart and the way they executed their skill with passion. They transported you into a whole new world, and made you notice the nuances.

And then, you grow older! Sometimes Wiser!

When your mind is fucked up by the thought of her, wondering how it was nothing but fuck and slowly, over time, it became more than fuck and at the same time, fucking became making love and the journey within the making love included fucking, going back and forth, losing breaths, missing heartbeats, lost in sensory perceptions, heaving together, sighing together until you are so fucked, you don’t exist and she doesn’t exist, both bodies hanging and floating in mid air, and as you stare into her closed eyes, in that moment, it suddenly dawns on you, she has fucked your heart like no one has

From Michael Jackson to Mel Gibson, Borat to Michael Richards, should you judge their creations because of the shortcomings in them?

Do you stop buying MJ’s CD’s because you believe he could be a child molester?

Do you stop watching Mel Gibson’s movies because he is anti-Semitic?

Do you stop laughing at Michael Richards jokes in Seinfeld because he thinks less of African-Americans?

More Artiste fiasco’s

You never know when it hits you. A whiff of earthy sand? Gentle caress of frail cold breeze? Silent pause in your favourite movie as two lips melts in each other? Or the extended humming in the interlude of a haunting melody?

There are all kinds of Emotional Triggers(ET) that swarm you into Emotional Restlessness(ER)!

More Triggers

“I have seen it done better!”

A Sly remark. Unjust. Unwarranted. Quick. Sharp. Your nerves boil in an instant. Just when you thought you could stand that person, they had to make you feel unskilled, incapable, unworthy and above all, disrespected. While your mind is blanking out with these thoughts, the offender has moved on to next item on their list. The conversation has moved on. You just lost your “Window” to get back. You lost your “Window” to ask “How can you? “. You lost your “Window” to say “How Dare You?”

Rest of Of

The most awaited movie of the year in Bollywood has finally been released and ready to be ripped apart by critics and viewers alike. There was no lack of motivation to see this flick as my wife digs Abhishek and I dig Rani Mukherjee (now stop thinking nasty), and above all, our living room was hostage to two wonderful kids of visiting friends, who made our hearts pound faster with each thud on the hardwood floors.

The 8’oclock show started promptly at 8.30pm and we were excited to find the ‘first’ seats (Row 1, Seat no.1&2 right under the 20ft. screen). My loyal friend called in to convey the happy news at that exact moment,

“You know, Indian team is not bad. You know, Kaif played awesomely. Really Awesome dude! You know, Kumble was even more awesome.You know finally the south Indians are displaying that killer instinct like Punjabis!”(Score: You Know=3, Awesome = 3)
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Score after 5 minutes, You Know = 20, Awesome=13! You sure have come across someone, who has this uncanny ability of spoiling the conversation with their excessive usage of supposedly cool quirky fillers! Most of the times, we are the culprits!

More Fillers

Why do you always feel it takes less time while returning, than while going, to the same place? Does it have anything to do with the concept of home? Returning to Safety? Or is it because your mind was working hard, mapping the path, forming new neural patterns while going and once formed, it relaxes while returning in the same path, so you feel it was quicker?

Why are you compelled to watch a movie you love when it comes on TV, even though, you have that DVD staring in your face from your rotating-DVD-rack? Is it because you feel a free meal is being missed? Is it because there is no other interesting program on other channels? Or Is it because when you were channel surfing and hit upon a particular scene in that movie, it brought back happy-memories that you want to re-live?

Instead of sleeker iPods, SUV’s that look like trailers and Mother-Of-All-Bombs, I wish scientists concentrated more on issues that affect us profoundly.

A new drug that alters your gene to change the color of your skin! No more Racism!

A new “pound-less” pill that lets you lose weight overnight! No more Prejudice!

A new tonic that alters your behavior to cure your smoking/alcohol addiction! No more Self-screw-ups!

When I was in my Eleventh grade, I had to give a speech on “Greatest Inventions of 20th Century!”. As I was preparing for the topic, my hostel warden, passed by. Since I respect him a lot, I asked him what he thought was the greatest invention of Mankind in 20th century.

I haven’t been tagged since the time I got out of school, where my glasses were color-coded with wordings “I am” on left and “Blind” on right. I have decided to ward off my “MSM” memories and start my list on Shpriya’s request for 8 qualities you would like in your perfect lover(for those of you still wondering what “MSM” is, its “Mommy Save Me!” memories) .

So here it goes!

1) Someone who has enough imperfections in her that I can help her to overcome but not so much that I need an in-house therapist!

2) I should be able to pick my nose, bite my nails, dust my dandruff and scratch my balls without wondering if I would be “denied” for those reality “bites” or “scratches”!

While in “Down Under”,
If you fall down under,
Would you call that,
“Down down Under under?”

In your sleep,
In that dream,
If you’re sleeping,
Do you dream a dream?

When every Buyer,
Has got a seller,
What do they mean by,
Seller Market doing good,
Buyer Market not so good ?

More Rejects

“Every civilization finds it necessary to negotiate compromises with its own values!”—George Jonas/Tony Kushner/Eric Roth

The greatest aspect of Munich is not the visual treat that you see inside the dark theatre for over two hours; but the questions it raises, after you have experienced it!

Are you really civilized if “Revenge” is the path you take for the salvation of your country?

Does the phrase “One man’s Freedom fighter is another man’s terrorist!” hold true?

When survival is at stake, do the methods of how you get out of it matter?

You struggle with these questions and there is no one right answer!

Are you the kind of person who counts backwards from 60 in the shower because you had just applied your shampoo? Well if you are, then you must go through what I do everyday (with a huge presumption that you do take bath everyday).How do people come up with that one minute prescribed exact time for shampoo? And what happens if you leave it longer than a minute? Does your hair turn grey? Has anyone tested these kinds of things? Do they assume people know how to count or a clock is required when you are in the shower? But then, it is also recommended that you should close your eyes while applying shampoo, which means even if a clock is available, you can’t open your eyes to see it. That definitely leaves us with only the option of counting.

A sense of clueless ness where your mind is under a grip of aching want that you quite don’t know what it is but you feel it pervading you, immersing you into a state of inertia where all purposes seem pointless and you know, you are LOST!

Feeling lost,perhaps, is the most lingering emotion of our life that doesn’t get as much importance as “Happy” or “Sad” yet you seem to endure it as much as them. Is feeling lost, being sad? Not in the complete sense but there is sadness for the loss of things you have and more importantly, the things you don’t have. A Yearning. A Desire. A Need for a particular kind of person, particular lifestyle, an acceptance in the way you like it! It is strange to see how you can lose something that you don’t have. But what the mind can conceive and perceive, it tricks us into believing we can have them even though it has not transmuted into reality. And that’s where the loss for the things and people you don’t have come from. A disconnect between the mind, heart and reality.

Escaped sighs,
Warming closed lips!

Goosebumps tumbling across,
Hearts knowing no laws!

Whispering kisses,
Rising Hormones!

New language making way,
In moans, she sways!

Her Husband knocks,
While His Pants drop!

Leave me,
She pleads!

I can’t hold,
He screams!

Hubby opens the door,
She closes the Window!
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“Personal” computer shutting behind!

Here is my contribution to the engaging series called 55-word poem by English August!

Meera, 12, sixth grade. Dorm Room. Bunker bed in corner, near the window. 1:45am.
“I love the stars outside my window. Physics sir said there are thousands, no millions of them. Wonder how many zeros are there in a million? He keeps saying it all the time. I am afraid to ask. Maybe tomorrow I will ask him after class. Hope he doesn’t think I am stupid”.

Jesminder, 43, Mud House. Open-sky Bathroom. 3 kids. Alcoholic husband. 3:17am.
“I am going to kill this bastard one day. He stole the hidden money for Ashraff’s school fees to buy liquor! Again! I might have to stop Pintu from going to school this year. What has this world come to, God, where the mother has to choose between her kids to send to school?!”

Take those Shades Off, so you can feel the changing rays of sunlight in your eyes!

Disconnect that Cell phone, so you can connect to the person standing next to you!

Shut-down that Computer, so you can shut-up your constant need for information!

Turn-Off that Television, so you can turn-on your wife cooking in the kitchen!

Open your heart, so you can close your prejudices!

Stop focusing all the time on self, so you can start doing something for others!

Taking Off more here

Questions like these pop in your head when you’re brought into ER room at 3am for Kidney stones and you are screaming in pain at a scale of 12 on a 10 point scale and the ER-nurse is busy counting the number of letters in your long-desi-name asking you in that southern accent, “Is it r-a-m-a-sh-aan-d-ar-en?” and all you can muster to reply is, “Gimm-eee…daaaa…F&%#@# morphineeee!”.

Once the ER-special episode is over and you slowly slip into that unconscious and see a glowing light slowly approaching you, you wonder, how many would really attend if you were to die NOW!

Counting Begins here

So it is one of those days where you get up after cleaning the mess by your little baby and hope there is enough diapers left in the closet for the rest of day and all you can fantasize is that some day, your lazy husband would hold the kid for few minutes instead of being glued to television all the time and still expect you to cook three times a day since you are the one without the job now, as it was your fault to get pregnant and sacrifice your career for the sake of those innocent eyes staring at you….

Rest of the Moment

You have a deep urge to know how stuff works. An irresistible intellectual curiosity that ponders questions like the corporate influence in the expansion of British Empire, or socio-economic impact of flattening world, or why Men have nipples when they have no use for them. You understand the nuances in the writings of a poem or prose because you digest the impact of a phrase and react accordingly; Smile; Make a Pouty face; Bite your nails; Curl your hair; caress your goatee(scratch your balls, pick your nose for the intellectually unclean ones). You can appreciate the verbose dialogues in Glengary Glen Ross or Before Sunset or Good Will Hunting! Your definition of perfect day will always have a place for Upamanyu Chatterjee or John Grisham or Alvin Toffler. And above all, you have been in love, lost some love and always in search of a new love. Guess that should put in context who I mean by “Smart” people.

“Going on a journey with a map requires following directions - going on a journey without one requires following your heart.” - Tom Krause

There is a moment in everyone’s life where you know, some part of your self has changed irrevocably. For some, it is sudden, like the loss of a family member. For some, it is a slow, mutating process inside you, like that of Ernesto ‘Che’ Guevara, riding on a beat-up Motorcycle with his friend, Alberto Granado,on a 13,250km road-trip across Latin America.

Ride 50miles/hr across Chile

I turned 15 when I was 7, when my Dad slapped my mom in front of me!
I turned 7 when I was 15, when my Grandmother hugged me after her surgery!

I turned 18 when I was 10, when my mom finally left my abusive Dad!
I turned 10 when I was 18, when I had a pillow fight with my roommate!

I turned 25 when I was 13, when my mom dropped me at my cousin’s place to study!
I turned 13 when I was 25, when I bought my first car!

Read More

I came,She saw and He saw it too!

I came to see if it was just Lust!
She came to see if it was Love!
He came to see what is it that She wanted to see!